As a child, I was often a worrier. Nope, not a warrior. A worrier. I had a happy face, chubby cheeks and big belly, but some thoughts in my mind were unnecessarily too ‘deep’ for my age. I worried over things I had little or absolutely no power to change. My family was reasonably comfortable, so money wasn’t the issue. I’d worry about issues like the creation of mankind, the end time, family relationships, neighbors, and even passers-by.
I remember one of those days (I was probably 14 by then and I was going through a phase of depression) my mum sent me to get some items from a store, and a stranger who came to purchase stuff was frowning. And I found myself thinking, “What is wrong with her? Does she have problems in her family?” Even after I finished purchasing, I worried all the way home, and I think I lost some of my mum’s change in the process.
At age 16, I got into the University and about 10 months after, I was diagnosed with Bipolar Affective Disorder. This illness is characterized by depression (feelings of hopelessness) + maniac episodes (being overly energetic, violent, loss of touch with reality, very little sleep daily). It was a horrendous phase of my life. I was required to visit the Psychiatric Hospital once a month to get medicines, injections, and regular check ups. I HATED it! I’ll never forget my HATE relationship with medications. I had relapses a good number of times because I hated the medicines and wouldn’t take them (I was still in the University). Recuperating from those relapses were my utmost worst experiences.
Trust me- Medicine has its place. Counselling is a necessity. But ONLY GOD heals. Thank God for counseling, medicine, family and God-sent friends. My total emancipation from BAD came when I found, ate, and worked out the scripture “Guard your thoughts with all diligence for out of it are the issues of life.” (Proverbs 4:23)